Relationships - past, present, future

Before we get into the post, it's been forever since I've made some music recs. Let's stick with a couple Canadian acts:
"Earthtones" by Bahamas - saw him with Gavin. Sounded just like the album. A wonderful indie rock artist who dabbles in doo-wop. I have yet to hear an artist that nails the genre blend as consistently as he does. My text notification tone is a guitar riff from one of his songs "Lost in the Light" (from the album "Barchords").
"The Hurt of Happiness" by Hey Ocean! - this Vancouver indie pop band had an incredibly long hiatus between albums (6 years). I saw them perform at the Canada Day festivities downtown last year when they announced they'd be coming out with new music. It finally arrived a couple months ago. They have killer harmonies and a levity to their sound that makes me smile whenever they come up on my playlist.

After Parksville, I did 4 weeks at BC Children's ER. Pros: finite hours, no need for follow through. Cons: fucked up sleep schedule, and very disappointing cases. The adrenaline rushes, come maybe once a shift or every other shift at best. Everything else is a letdown. So many kids with the sniffles, diarrhea or constipation. Boring. Efficiency is my game and I've never been one to do the whole baby talk or make farting noises when I examine a kid. It's about proving that I'm harmless, distracting the kid, and letting them feel like they have some control. I will chat with them like an adult and use my sarcasm because their parents seem to appreciate it. I had a couple comments from parents akin to "How old are your kids?" only to follow it with "Well you'll be a great mother" when I say I don't have kids. Every instance, I was being me doing my job and making witty comments. If that's great motherhood, then my understanding of motherhood is drastically off. Regardless, I thank them for the compliment and then show them the door.

I followed the ER with a 2-week vacation that allowed me to visit Erin, Jesse, and Xavier up in Prince Rupert. That little boy is ridiculously cute. Erin, now there's your all-star mom. Man, I cannot get over how much I love her and love seeing her as a mother. However we are still the same kids who met 30 years ago. For her and Jesse's birthdays I bought them nerf guns. And yes, I did have to go through an extra screening at the airport because they were in my carry-on. Essentially every night or naptime, we'd be playing with the guns. Shooting at Xavier's toys and assigning points for head shots or getting the dart through a ring. I should note that we don't have the greatest track record with toy guns. When I returned from a trip to Disneyland with high school friends, I bought Erin a Buzz Lightyear gun that fired foam disks. We decided to play rounds of shooting the gun at each other while using a bat to hit them back - in the basement, naturally. We were 18 years old. We ended up taking a chunk out of the basement ceiling in her parents' home. We considered getting decorative doilies and putting them all over the ceiling so that they wouldn't know where the dent was. We finally walked back upstairs to tell her dad what we'd done. We still bust a gut about it to this day. So when we were at Xavier's toy shooting range and managed to shoot a dart through the vents of the gas fireplace, we looked at each other and said "Get the decorative doilies!!" while laughing uncontrollably. We eventually had to walk down stairs to tell Jesse what we'd done. It was a wonderful trip down memory lane, appreciating this gift of Xavier, and looking forward to their life as a family. 

Upon my return, I was able to celebrate Deen's 30th via a delicious lunch, a trying yoga session (due to overeating lunch and fighting the urge to vomit while in child's pose), followed by drinks. Deen's yet another ray of sunshine in my life. She is game for anything and great conversation every time. While our relationship now mostly consists of meals and movies together with consistent texting, I still get to caress her body in public and appreciate her complete nonchalance. One of the greatest things she's ever done for me is make me dinner. We discovered the night before that we'd be the only ones home (at the Dunbar house) the next day for dinner. She said she'd make me dinner so that it'd be ready by the time I got home from work. As a joke I said "Wear something slutty". Bless her heart, the next day, I got in the door from a long day's work to be welcomed with delicious smells, a table set for two, and Deen holding a freshly opened beer for me - wearing something...Jeff is a lucky man. 

So there's Erin - my life long love. Deen - my closest companion. And of course, you'd have to be brand new to me to not know Courtenay - my passionate pursuit. I had the pleasure of seeing Court at Deen's birthday party and seeing her alive and smiling continues to light my heart. To this day, she is a physical reminder of the power of honest prayer - not in the sense that you get what you pray for, but the awe-filled experience of hitting rock bottom, laying yourself bare before something unseen, and then being met with a peace that is like no other. I was able to see the three women I care most about in a two-week span. That does something to a person like me who stresses the importance of relationships. That's a kind of recharge that I can't express or find in anything else. 

After vacation it was time to switch gears and spend time at my family clinic while doing cross-coverage for the hospitalist ward at St Paul's. It makes for long days, and add in that it's biking season again, my body and mind was needing sleep and not getting enough of it. It didn't help that the co-chief responsibilities were getting on my nerves so much, I considered giving up the role altogether. A weekend call shift was nearing the 12 hour mark and nowhere near the end as I was checking up on a dementia patient again due to a significant drop in her hemoglobin. We had a pleasant interaction earlier that morning. She was still delightful when I checked on her the second time and brought up her new developments. I finished explaining things, what we would do next, and pending that, how we'd proceed, when she said "Yip. Are you related to the famous Yip Sang?". Keep in mind this was the second time I saw her and I told her my name the first time, but it's possible she forgot our earlier interaction.
"Yes, that's my great great grandfather. I'm from the #10 son."

My great great grandfather was the Yip who came from China for the gold rush and ended up recruiting Chinese immigrants to work on the CPR. He worked hard, was business savvy, philanthropic, and incredibly fertile - all of which tends to leave quite the lasting legacy. He had 4 wives and 23 children. Chances are I'm related to most Yips in BC, but I don't know them. Even when I was in Parksville, I was asked if I was related to a Yip in the neighbourhood and I could only say "probably". 

"Oh wow, that's so interesting. I know some Yips"
"I'm probably related to them, but don't know them."
"Do you know my friend, Yuey Yip?"

I immediately started crying. I took myself by surprise. She was so sweet. She held my hand while laying in bed. My patient was comforting me. She started asking about my grandmother and then my aunt Karen. I brought her up to date on the family. I showed her the picture below of my grandparents and let her reminisce while I dried my eyes. 

My Grandpa's passing was a difficult one to go through, largely due to the fact that I did it alone in Chicago, and dealing with a family that constantly stressed my medical journey was more important than coming home which I completely disagree with. To recognize that almost exactly 3 years since his passing, I was nearly done my first year of residency in Vancouver - the city my great grandfather, my grandfather, and my father were born and raised in - it's certainly a miracle. He would be proud, I know. My whole family is proud and my grandmother often tells me often that Grandpa would be proud. But this was the first time when I actually felt it. It wasn't said to me by a relative. It wasn't said at all. It was a patient who was friends with him and I took stock of where I was, what I was doing, what it took to get there, and what he'd think about it all. 

Whatever I accomplish in this life in work, money, or possession is all nothing to me compared to how I live and affect those I interact with. My integrity and using my power and influence to be something good in this world will always take precedence. Relationships - past, present, future - that is my life.